When is the right time to talk to children about gender identity and gender expression? Children internalize messages about gender from a very young age, so it’s never too early to start.
If you’re feeling unsure about how navigate these conversations, you’re not alone. One way to begin to explore the topic is through books.
By dispelling stereotypes and promoting acceptance and inclusivity, the following books encourage children to feel comfortable expressing their authentic selves.
Can’t Transitions To Can
by Leah Irby
A transgender ant feels frustrated because her body looks red, but she dreams of being indigo-colored instead. A cisgender turtle wants to try to jump so high she touches the sky.
When they meet, the ant is torn between revealing her true identity and staying safe, so she introduces herself as Can’t the red ant. The turtle is full of enthusiasm and encouragement, but the ant remains skeptical. Woven with lessons learned from the non-binary grasshopper, will the turtle ever get the ant to jump? Will the ant find the courage to reveal her true self?
Julian Is a Mermaid
by Jessica Love
The book follows the story of a young boy named Julián, who spots three magical women dressed as mermaids on the subway and wants to go home and re-create the look for himself. He worries what his abuela will think of this, but Julián is ultimately supported in being his true mermaid self.
Jacob’s New Dress
by Sarah and Ian Hoffman, illustrated by Chris Case
Jacob wants to wear a dress to school. Will his parents allow it? What will the other kids say? In a follow-up book, Jacob’s Room to Choose, Jacob and his friend Sophie confront the gendered bathroom divide, and in Jacob’s School Play: Starring She, He and They, readers meet a nonbinary character.
Call Me Max
by Kyle Lukoff, illustrated by Luciano Lozano
The book follows a trans boy named Max, who on the first day of school lets his teacher know that Max is the name he’d like to be called by, despite her feeling hesitant about it. This ultimately begins Max’s journey as he befriends others at school and reveals his feelings about his identity to his parents.
I Am Jazz
by Jazz Jennings and Jessica Herthel, illustrated by Shelagh McNicholas
Based on the real-life experiences of television personality and LGBTQ rights activist Jazz Jennings, the book tells the story of a young trans girl named Jazz who’s known she’s a girl from the age of 2. Although her family is initially confused by this, they later come to understand what Jazz is experiencing with the help of a doctor.
Who Are You? : The Kid’s Guide To Gender Identity
Pessin-Whedbee, Brook
This brightly illustrated children’s book provides a straightforward introduction to gender for anyone aged 5+. It presents clear and direct language for understanding and talking about how we experience gender: our bodies, our expression and our identity. An interactive three-layered wheel included in the book is a simple, yet powerful, tool to clearly demonstrate the difference between our body, how we express ourselves through our clothes and hobbies, and our gender identity. Ideal for use in the classroom or at home, a short page-by-page guide for adults at the back of the book further explains the key concepts and identifies useful discussion points.
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